The achievement of a separate individuality depends on two conditions: The establishment of a cohesive self-image. In fact, the sense of being an individual is nothing but taking oneself to be this self-image. In other words the individual is a mental structure constructed in the mind. Before this construct is developed, according to object relations theory, there is no sense of being a person. The internalization of a positively regarded image of the mother (the "good mother"). The individual, that is the self-image, is supported psychically by the presence of the mother's image; thus the child does not feel alone when physically separate from the mother. He feels supported by the presence of the mother's image, which gives him a sense of security, which allows him to be away from her, and makes it safe to regard her as an autonomous person.
Pearl Beyond Price, p. 25
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The sense of oneself as a separate individual, which as we have seen depends upon the development of a cohesive self-image, can be seen as composed of memories and, in fact, cannot exist without its connection to memories, to personal history. But the memory of a person is not the same as a person. The memory is of something that supposedly existed at some point in the past.
Pearl Beyond Price, p. 27
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